COLIN GETS PROMOTED AND DOOMS THE WORLD, sneaky, mean-spirited, and all the more fun for it

COLIN GETS PROMOTED AND DOOMS THE WORLD
MARK WADDELL
Ace Books (non-affiliate Bookshop.org link)
$12.99 ebook, available now

Rating: 4.25* of five

The Publisher Says: WARNING! Under no circumstances must employees strike a deal with unauthorized personnel on Dark Enterprises property. Such behavior may result in death…or the end of the world.

Colin is a low-level employee at Dark Enterprises, a Hell-like multinational corporation solving the world’s most difficult problems in deeply questionable ways. After years of toiling away in a cubicle, he’s ready to climb the corporate ladder and claim the power he’s never had.

The only problem is, he’s pretty sure he’s about to be terminated. Like, terminated. That’s tough, because his BFF has just set him up with a great guy. In fact, maybe he’s a little too great. And he asks a lot of questions . . .

When Colin meets a shadowy figure promising his deepest desire in return for a small, unspecified favor, he can’t resist the urge to fast-track his goals. He asks for the one thing that will improve his life: a promotion.

But that small favor unleashes an ancient evil. People in New York are disappearing, the world might be ending, and Management is starting to notice. Getting to the top is never easy, and now it’s up to Colin to save the world. It’s the ultimate power move, after all

I RECEIVED A DRC FROM THE PUBLISHER VIA NETGALLEY. THANK YOU.

My Review: Who had "corporate horror comedy" on their 2025 bingo card? Anyone? Well if you did, and be honest! you didn't did you, cover the square. I was pretty lukewarm about Horrorstör, the famously comedic workplace horror novel all y'all were cooing over in 2015, but I give this book a far better, far more amused, rating.

I enjoyed the Everyman at the center of this absurd story of diabolical shenanigans, our blah, sculpted cream cheese MC Colin, because he seemed exactly and precisely the kind of good-enough average white dude who would fall for any trap set for him. He's got no excellence in his being; he's got no interest in better-than, only good-enough; he's so bloodymindedly solipsistic that he scores in negative numbers on any empathy test.

He is, in short, the masked guy in ICEstapo. Practically literally. His actual job is so vile, so over-the-top evil, that his Eichmanning above it all to assume that following orders is somehow exculpatory...well, we know where that got the real Eichmann. One of the few cases where real life gave the world real catharsis, that.

Then Colin meets Eric, his love! Surely he'll be redeemed by luuuv, right? Eric is such a sweet, supportive block of blancmange, he *must* exert a positive influence on cream-cheesy Colin, right? Right?

This story was finely calibrated for my ever-darkening sensibilities. It uses its familiarity of tone and topic to slide into your "amuse-me" centers without pinging an alarm. Then, at some individually-determined point, the penny drops and the game is given away.

A far more effective takedown of the amusement-industrial complex than any strident polemic. Ring a tocsin for the world...we are doomed.

I can't quite get to five stars because, by its nature, the story leads the reader into certain assumptions about its trajectory and gives no indication that the game's afoot. Or if it did I'm too dimwitted to have caught it. The bait-and-switch technique runs the very real risk of switching readers off...I switched off, couldn't figure out why, went off to read some reviews and voilà! All was clear, so I finished it up knowing where I was going. Enjoyed it hugely. (Take that Spoiler Stasi!)
Not really for everyone, perhaps even most; but please, if you do start it, remember that you're **NOT** headed where you think you are.

I recommend it.